Young Blue Eyes

Me: ''Aaaaw! You have such beautiful eyes!''

''Yeah, they're to die for.''

Me: ''Absolutely.''

''To DIE for.''

Me: ...

The Mother of all betrayals

Me: ''Hey Mister M! We're going to the pet store to buy treats and cat nip. Aren't you excited?''

''Treats and cat nip?! Oh my God! Hurry up driver!''

''Wait a minute... The pet store is the other way. We're going to...''

''...the vet.''

''Traitors.''

''I bet your fingers taste amazing. Bring them closer. Cloooooser Doctor...''

''Grrrrrrrrr!!!!! Aaarrrghhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!''

''I'm neutered. Nothing to see here, Pervert.''

''Oh Lord...''

''What's that?!''

''Traitors.''

''The thermometer? Are you kidding me?"

''Stay calm and plot your revenge.''

''Can we go pleeeeaaase? From now on, I'll be super nice to Jester. I promise.''

Me: ''We're done kitty. You did it like a champ! We can go home now.''

''What did I just say about Jester? I must have been high or something.''

''Now we're going to the pet store. You owe me big time, Traitors.''

Let's play a game...

Me: ''What are you doing Jester?''

''I'm playing hide and seek with Mister M. He told me to stay here and to count to 200,000.''

Me: ''Really? And now you're at...?''

''Eh, 27... 28...29...''

Me: ''Ok ok, please stop counting.'' 

''But Mister told me to...''

Me: ''I think Mister Minoune is just messing with you. He's outside. You are playing alone.''

''He's hiding outside? You weren't supposed to tell me!''

Me: ''No, you don't understand. Mister Minoune is taking a nap on the balcony. HE'S NOT PLAYING HIDE AND SEEK WITH YOU.''

''It's a trick, right? You're on Mister's team and he asked you to mislead me.''

Me: ...

''Just give me one clue. I won't tell him you cheated.''

***

Me: '' Hey Mister M! Aren't you supposed to be playing hide and seek with Jester?''

''What?''

Me: ''He was counting alone in the living room...''

''Really? Woooahahaha!!!''

Me: ''Oh, you think it's funny? What did you tell him exactly?'' 

''I told him to lay down like this...''

''... to cover his eyes and to count to 200,000. I didn't think he would do it!''

Me: ''He thinks you're still playing.''

''I won!''

Me: ...

Do not disturb

Zzzzzzzzzz...

Me: ''That's a weird spot to take a nap. Why don't you go on the balcony?''

''I was trying to find a spot where I would be left ALONE.''

Me: ...

''But I guess ALONE is a word you don't understand.''

A little resentment

Me: ''So? Are you coming in? I won't wait here all night!''

''Oh really? I waited 3 days for you.''

Me: ''I've told you at least 10 times: I was visiting my family.''

''I've told you at least 20 times: I AM your family.''

Me: (Sigh) ''Well... Do you want to see the gift I bought for you, or should I close the door?''

''A gift?''

Me: ''Here, look...''

''OH. MY. GOD!!!!!''

Me: ''Do you forgive me?''

''Mmmmm... a big bag of treats just for me. Do I smell beef?''

Me: ''Can we call a truce?''

''What? A truce, yeah sure, whatever... These are my favourites. Hurry up! Open the bag!''

Me: ...

Jealousy

Me: ''Hi Mister M! Do you want to come in?''

''No. I need to talk to you.''

Me: ''I'm listening.''

''Somebody told me that you went to see the kittens in the back alley and you thought 

they were soooo cute. You even brought them a can of MY Fancy Feast. Is that true?

Me: ''Yes, it's true.''

''You think they're cuter than me?''

Me: ''They're kittens! Of course they're adorable! That doesn't mean we find them prettier than you.''

''Is it true that you brought one back here?''

Me: ''What? Who told you that?! We didn't bring back any kitten!''

''You're sure?''

Me: ''Of course I'm sure!''

 ''What was that? Did you hear that noise?''

Me: ''What noise?''

 ''It sounded like... meow.''

Me: ''It's all in your head.''

 ''There's no kitten here? You swear?''

Me: ''YES. I swear.''

''Ok, I believe you...''

Me: ''I hope so!''

''But I'm watching you...''

What's up?

Me: ''Hello kitties!''

... 

Me: ''What are you looking at?''

...

Me: ''Hey! What's up peanut?''

... 

Me: ''Hellooooo! What are you looking at???''

''Nothing''.

Me: ''Nothing, really?''

''Yes, nothing. Like in There's nothing for you to see.''

Me: ...